“Some people hold on to resentment, anger, guilt,and hurt from their past. Have you ever seen older people with permanently grouchy faces? It’s like they are wearing years of pain, hurt and resentment on their faces, and they tend to see the not-so-perfect quality in everyone around them. Maybe someone wronged them in the past, and they still feel resentful and wouldn’t forgive that person. Maybe they feel guilty for what they did or did not do years ago, and still beat themselves up over and over. Resentment and guilt can ruin any relationship. Have you ever tried to guilt trip someone? How effective is that? ‘
If you are in a relationship with someone who tries to make you feel guilty, I bet you would feel resentful toward that person over time. Malachy McCourt once said, “Resentment is like drinking poison and hoping the other person would die.” You might think that by not forgiving someone, you are punishing him/her, but in fact, you are the one (sometimes, the only one) suffering. I have seen in many cases where people wouldn’t forgive their spouses for things from as bad as cheating or abuse, to very trivial things that their spouses don’t even remember. The sad thing is, sometimes their spouses didn’t even know why they were mad in the first place. So, who is being punished?”
Hueina Su, in “Intensive Care for the Nurturer’s Soul”
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Jeff Maziarek, author of Spirituality Simplified and Codi’s Journey, launched Pondercentral.com in April 2007 as a Web-based forum for “PONDER on THIS,” a series of weekday inspirational email messages he began sending to subscribers in March 1999. A FREE service since its inception, “PONDER on THIS” provides subscribers with meaningful content to assist them on their individual paths of spiritual growth. In addition, it benefits subscribers, authors, and publishers by including links to Amazon.com where subscribers can learn more about the book being quoted, and also purchase it.