“There are no good reasons not to forgive others because, regardless of how others have behaved, if we don’t forgive them, we’re only hurting ourselves. We’re only perpetuating our own suffering. We think we’re punishing others when we withhold forgiveness. We think we’re beating them up with guilt and shame. However, the ironic truth is that, because of the nature of projection, it is ourselves we’re attacking. It is ourselves we’re punishing. It is ourselves we’re keeping in an emotional prison.
The only way to put an end to this self-punishment is to stop punishing others with our harsh judgments and to forgive them instead. Consequently, every day we remind ourselves that we are determined to forgive others for our own good. Every day, we remind ourselves that we are determined to forgive others for our own self-esteem and success. Every day we remind ourselves that we are determined to forgive others because not to do so may be gratifying to our petty, selfish, frightened ego, but will forever keep us from the life we want.”
Walter E. Jacobson, M.D., in “Forgive to Win”
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